An Arab Sheikh's son in Berlin

An Arab Sheikh's son goes to Germany to study.

A month later, he sends a letter to his dad saying:

"Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here, but I'm a bit ashamed to arrive to school with my gold Mercedes when all my teachers travel by train."

Sometime later he gets a letter from his dad with a ten million dollar check saying: "Stop embarrassing us! go and get yourself a train too!"

پسر يك شيخ عرب براي تحصيل به آلمان رفت. يك ماه بعد نامه اي به اين مضمون براي پدرش فرستاد:

«برلين فوق‏العاده است، مردمش خوب هستند و من واقعا اينجا را دوست دارم، ولي يك مقدار احساس شرم مي‏كنم كه با مرسدس طلاييم به مدرسه بروم در حالي كه تمام دبيرانم با ترن جابجا مي‏شوند.»

مدتي بعد نامه‏اي به اين شرح همراه با يك چك يك ميليون دلاري از پدرش برايش رسيد:

«بيش از اين ما را خجالت نده، تو هم برو و براي خودت يك ترن بگير!»

آرزوی زن ها 

Women's Wish

 جوک انگلیسی با ترجمه

The Elevator - آسانسور

An Amish boy and his father were in a mall.

They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, "What is this, Father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded,
"Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, ugly old lady moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button.
The walls opened, and the lady walked between them into a small room. 
The walls closed, and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially.

They continued to watch until it reached the last number, and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.

Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blond stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, "Go get your mother."

ترجمه در ادامه مطلب

شادترین روز زندگی

Happiest Day of Life

Attending a wedding for the first time, little Susie whispered to her mother, “Why is the bride dressed in white?”
Her mother said, “Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.”
Little Susie thought about this for a moment, then said “So why is the groom wearing black?”

attend : حضور یافتن
wedding : جشن عروسی
whispered : به آرامی گفت
bride : عروس
groom : داماد

School jokes

Teacher: Why are you late for school? 
Johnny: Because of the Sign. 
Teacher: What Sign? 
Johnny: The sign that says "School ahead go slow"

Teacher: If you eat fish? 
Student: It's good for my eyes. 
Teacher: If you don't eat fish? 
Student: It's good for the fish!

مابقی جک ها در ادامه مطلب

انگلیسی زبان دشواری است ... برای برخی!

English is a difficult language .... for some!

This is a true story from the Japanese Embassy in US!!!

لطفا نظر بدهید

Pleas Leave Comments    

 Funny Joke

blood test آزمایش خون

Two children were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying very loudly.
2nd Child: Why are you crying?

1st Child: I came here for a blood test.

2nd Child: So? Are you afraid?

1st Child: No. For the blood test, they cut my finger.

At this, the second one started crying profusely.

The first one was astonished.

1st Child: Why are you crying now?

2nd Child: I came for a urine test !

Nice One!

A British Airways flight was going to Tehran from London.
When it gets close to Tehran it starts having some kind of trouble.
The pilot contacts the air tower at Tehran airport and asks for help:

'Tehran, this Captain Smith, British Airways flight 000, do you read me?'

' Felight 000, dis iz Tehran felight control, go ahead'
 
'Tehran, this is flight 000, we have a problem'
 
'Dis iz Tehran, vat kind of peroblem?'
 
' This is flight 000, we have lost power to our engines, please advice'
 
'Dis iz Tehran, I reed you, peleez check some sings for me, ok?' 

' This is flight 000, go ahead'

  ......

 Funny English Joke

to Help You Learn English

What time is it?

A tramp lie down and sleep in the park. He had been sleeping for about 5 minutes when a couple walked by. The man stopped, woke the tramp up , and asked him, "Excuse me. Do you know what the time is?" The tramp replied, "I'm sorry - I don't have a watch, so I don't know the time." The man apologised for waking the tramp and the couple walked away. The tramp lay down again, and after a few minutes went back to sleep. Just then, a woman, who was out walking her dog, shook the tramp's shoulder until he woke up again.

The woman said, "I'm sorry to trouble you, but I'm afraid I've lost my watch - do you happen to know the time?" The tramp was a little annoyed at being woken up again, but he politely told the woman that he didn't have a watch and didn't know the time.

After the woman had gone, the tramp had an idea.

He opened the bag that contained all his possessions and got out a pen, a piece of paper and some string. On the paper, he wrote down, 'I do not have a watch. I do not know the time'.

He then hung the paper round his neck and eventually dropped off again.

After about 15 minutes, a policeman who was walking through the park noticed the tramp asleep on the bench, and the sign around his neck.

He woke the tramp up and said, "I read your sign. I thought you'd like to know that it's 2:30 p.m."

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tramp = Homeless person

Apologize = To make excuse for a fault or offense

Politely = Adv for Politely. Refine / Showing consideration for others

Contain = To have as component part

Possession = Noun for possess. To own something

 Funny Jokes

Father: Why did you fail your mathematics test?
Son: On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8
Father: So?
Son: On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8 And on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8.
If she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?

 *****************************************************************************************

A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were
watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of
breaking plates,
then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father.

Daughter: It's mummy!
Father: How do you know?
Daughter: She didn't say anything. 

Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy: No, mine is undying love

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: As old as me
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born

Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you
anything!
Son: That's why I say she's no good!

Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much
would your father still have?
Ted: $10.
Teacher: You don't know maths.
Ted: You don't know my father!

A boy came home from school with his exam results.
"What did u get?" asked his father.
"My marks are under water," said the boy.
"What do u mean 'under water'?"
"They are all below 'C' (sea) level"

 Driving In Iran

رانندگی در ایران

^{Chicago: One hand on wheel, one hand out of window.
شیکاگو: یک دست روی فرمان، یک دست بیرون پنجره}

 ترجمه شعر اتل متل توتوله به زبان انگلیسی

How's Hassan's Cow?
She doesn't have neither milk nor They took her milk to India.
Marry a Kurdish Woman.
Name her amghezy... Around her hat reddish.
Aachin and Vaachin cross one of your legs!

Iranjoke.ir

طریقه درس خواندن در دانشگاه

 The Way of Study in University

شروع ترم Start of term یک هفته بعد از شروع ترم One week after start of term دو هفته بعد از شروع ترم Two weeks after start of term

English Jokes

Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map.
Maria: This is it.  
Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America?
Class: Maria did.

.........................................................................................

A: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
B: Yes I am, I married the wrong woman.

.........................................................................................

A: Did you hear that a baby was fed on elephant's milk and gained twenty pounds in a week.
B: That's impossible. Whose baby?
A: An elephant's.

English Jokes

A: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi.
B: Yes, sir. You are a taxi.

............................................................................................................

A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.

"Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"

"Wrong number," replied the girl.

............................................................................................................

A teacher asked a student to write 55.
Student asked: How?
Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5!
The student wrote 5 and stopped.
teacher: What are you waiting for?
student: I don't know which side to write the other 5!